So I joined the
gym of my local college campus. Pasted on the entrance one day I happened to
catch a schedule for a previously unknown to me meditation hall annex to the
sports center. I decided to check it out.
I've been meditating
for myself over the previous year. Frankly I would have never started had not
physical troubles pushed me to it. Meditation as alternative medicine was
frequently mentioned in the books I consulted and decided to give it a try. If
nothing else as a way to take over my own recovery. Well, I had been meditating
with more or less success in a standing posture, but felt I could do even
better with some guidance. My first impetus was posture itself. Though not
prohibited by any means, standing straight is not mainstream. Maybe some
regular time tested sitting might help.
The first couple
visits to the meditation hall were unsuccessful as it was they were sessions
already going on (yoga I think) and didn't want to distract the girls there. On
the third go, I chanced on a general meditation workshop. Being a slow day,
there was only the instructor and a student. As I entered the teacher was
explaining the concept of koans to the student. The instructor invited me to
join, but startled at the unexpected welcomeness, I decided to let them be and
left. Undaunted, I tried yet once more, and finally caught the instructor by
himself the following week.
He was sitting there
by himself already on meditation with three more unoccupied cushions at his
sides. He stopped and kindly asked me to come in. He turned up to be a soft
spoken Westerner with 35 years of meditation experience.I explained that I was
there to try the cushions out. He said that by all means and promptly proceeded
to induct me. He asked me if I already meditated and which meditation school I
practiced (makeshift zen). He gave me a crash course anyway: how, to sit, where to feel the breathing (2 inches below
the navel), keep the eyes open, focus on no point, think on nothing (he did say
that) and to just return the awareness to it.
With that he told me
we would go for 20 minutes. He laughed when I tried to negotiate it down to
ten, my then maximum, set some meditation timer app and then we were at it.
Before long two more persons came into the hall, one sitting on the line of
cushions and the other behind us three.
Well, those twenty
minutes were not so bad as I expected. Actually, far from feeling any pressure
from the others I felt motivated by them. The practice felt more flowy, easier
and at times, deeper. Nothing dramatic, but the momentum did build upon itself.The
time for its part flew, but unlike my own practice I wondered from time to time
how much we had left, not out of anxiety, but of curiosity. Despite trying to
get into a proper posture (Burmese style) at the onset, I still felt my right
knee was off the floor. A bit uncomfortable on the whole, but not painful.
So when the digital
bowl rang from the phone, the instructor bowed forward, took a silent pause and
took a look 'round. One of the latecomers I recognized as the koan guy from
before; the other a female student. When I tried to stand up I found that my right
leg had numbed over; the koan guy seeing that, good naturedly chuckled and said
that it happens but over time it gets better. The girl, I saw, had pulled a
meditation bench from somewhere and on the spot I decided to try that next.
The instructor
proposed that we now switch to a five minute walking meditation. Same thing,
just fist over the thumb on the right, left hand. We went single file behind
him round the hall, although I had to stand there for the first few while
sensation came back to my leg. On the whole I liked this change, although it
was hard to focus on my breathing or on anything for that matter. Just the
circuit again and again. Probably that's the point if there's a point at all.
Maybe that's how the whirling dervishes, on another scale, get their kicks
(Update: from the 3 Pillars of Zen I learn this is called kinhin and its for
its own sake, to allow variety and to allow longer sitting periods) .
After another bowl
ring, the instructor invited us to another 20 minute sit to close the allotted
time. I politely begged off, having had my fill for the moment, but promised to
come back next week.
And so I did on the
weeks following. Same dynamics: sit around 20 to 25 minutes, walk five, sit
another 20. Different persons came and went, but we averaged three or four
consistently. The benefits I had noticed on my first try were still there with
differing intensity. I tried the bench and found it even better and eventually
bought one for myself on an auction site. The teacher gave a few pointers here
and there ("your posture is good, but you must let yourself drop").
My own solitary practice has strengthened. If you ever have the chance to try
to group meditate with a handful of people, I'd encourage you to to not let the
opportunity pass.
(If you are a Catholic, some, perhaps all, meditation practices might be harmful to you spiritual life. Check out Women of Grace or read what Sue Brinkmann has to say by googling her)
More next time
(If you are a Catholic, some, perhaps all, meditation practices might be harmful to you spiritual life. Check out Women of Grace or read what Sue Brinkmann has to say by googling her)
More next time